Wasted No More
I have no idea why I have to go through these hard times. I never wanted to admit that I’ve lost the ability of expressing myself in some kind of weird way. The truth is that I haven’t done this in a very long time, and I really should know that this is one thing I simply cannot drop, this is one of a few things that I’m actually good at.
Things become harder and harder. I think I lost myself in some strange situation where I have absolutely no control of myself. It just feels so annoying when everything you ever want is beyond your reach. I almost feel like I can touch something when I finally realize that it was all false hope.
The worst thing is: I can’t concentrate. It bothers me a lot! I don’t know why I have to be so easily distracted. My mind wanders a lot when I work, when I program, when I try so hard to learn something new. It gets worse and worse when I try to fix it. And I haven’t done any real work, I mean, real achievement in about two months. I know I really shouldn’t. Two months is a long time, I really shouldn’t wasted it.
Or maybe I just forget the things I’ve done. But, the truth that I forget things just proves the point that I didn’t do anything remarkable. I want to do something remarkable, I really do.
Time could be easily cut into pieces and then be wasted in the most unnoticeable way. However, situation didn’t get any better even though I knew this very fact within the very deep of my heart. All I ever want is a so-called change, which seems to be so hard to get, and so easily to be said.
What can I do, except keep trying and trying. I know I can’t be so wasted like this anymore. I need to stay focus, on every little things. Drop the phone every once in a while, and most importantly, stay away from social media.